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When Life Knocks You on Your Ass (And You Somehow Stand Back Up Anyway)

Hey.

Yeah, you. I’m glad you’re here for this one, because honestly… I wasn’t even sure I’d show up today. You know those mornings where your brain wakes up five hours before your body, and you’re just lying there thinking, “Oh great, another day of wrestling with my own mind. Fantastic.”

Yeah. That was me.

Borderline Personality Disorder is a very… special kind of hell sometimes. Not the dramatic kind people like to whisper about. I mean the quiet hell — the one where you’re trying to brush your teeth and suddenly your chest feels too tight, like your emotions are wearing steel-toe boots and kicking from the inside.

And then on top of that? You’re still trying to be a functioning human.
You’re still trying to show up for people.
You’re still trying to keep the house somewhat clean and not eat cereal for every meal.
(Some days the cereal wins. And honestly? Fair.)

But here’s the thing that hit me today — and I want to say it out loud because maybe you need to hear it too:

It’s okay to have days that feel fucking impossible. It doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.

We don’t give ourselves enough credit for the way we keep going.
Like, think about it: you’ve survived every terrible moment so far. Every meltdown. Every heartbreak. Every anxiety spiral at 11 pm when you were sure the world hated you.
And you’re still here.

Still breathing.
Still trying.
Still showing up, even if you’re crawling through it.

I think that’s pretty damn brave.

And if no one told you today — I’m proud of you.
For the big things and the tiny things.
For getting out of bed.
For drinking water.
For not texting that one person you know you shouldn’t.
For taking your meds even when your brain tried to convince you they’re “optional.”
(They’re not optional. Your brain lies. Trust me.)

Let me tell you something I realized this week, and it kind of softened something in me:
We don’t heal in straight lines. We heal in circles, spirals, loops, and sometimes zigzags that make absolutely no sense.

One day you feel strong and grounded.
The next day you’re crying because someone used the wrong tone.
Healing is messy — like “I thought I was fine and then suddenly I’m not and now I’m eating a granola bar under a blanket” messy.

But messy doesn’t mean broken.
Messy means real.

And honestly? I’d rather be real than perfect.
Perfect is boring. Perfect is fake. Perfect is exhausting.

So if today isn’t your day, that’s okay.
If you’re feeling everything all at once, or nothing at all… that’s okay too.
If your heart is heavy, or your brain is loud, or your emotions are doing backflips — you’re still allowed to take up space.

You’re allowed to rest.
You’re allowed to be soft.
You’re allowed to try again tomorrow.

And if today is one of the good days?
Celebrate the hell out of it.
Light a candle. Put on your favourite song. Do a silly little dance in your kitchen.
You deserve joy just as much as anyone else — and you don’t need to “earn” it.

So here’s my little reminder for both of us:
You’re not failing. You’re learning. You’re healing. You’re growing.

Even on the hard days.
Especially on the hard days.

Thanks for being here with me.
Really.
It means more than you know.

Until next time — take care of that soft, stubborn heart of yours. It’s doing the best it can. 💛

----Your Beautiful Mind

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