Skip to main content

To Me in 6 Months: I didn't Quit When It Got Quiet

Hey you.


Six months.


That number might not hit like fireworks, but it lands deeper than three months ever could. Because six months is where the adrenaline fades. The crisis energy quiets. The outside world assumes you’re “better now.”


And this is where the real work lives.


Six months ago, you were still running on survival instincts. Everything felt urgent. Every emotion felt like a five-alarm fire. You were gripping the edge of yourself, white-knuckling your way through days, promising yourself you’d just get through this hour.


Now?


Now you’re not constantly in free fall — but you’re not fully at peace either.


And that limbo can be terrifying.


Six months is where you start noticing space between moments. Space between triggers and reactions. Space between thoughts and actions. Space between wanting to disappear and actually choosing to stay.


That space is unfamiliar.

And unfamiliar can feel unsafe when chaos used to be home.


If you’ve been thinking, “Why does this still feel hard if I’m doing better?” — here’s the truth:


Because you’re not in crisis anymore — you’re healing.


And healing asks different things of you.


At six months, you’re starting to feel emotions more clearly. Not just pain, but grief. Anger. Longing. Regret. Hope that scares the shit out of you because you don’t want it taken away.


You’re not dissociating as much.

You’re not numbing as automatically.

You’re present — and presence hurts before it heals.


That doesn’t mean you’re going backwards.


It means your nervous system is learning that it doesn’t have to scream to be heard.


Six months is where you realize how much you were using survival behaviors to cope — substances, self-destruction, chaos, avoidance, people-pleasing, disappearing. And when those start falling away, you’re left with a terrifying question:


Who am I without the crisis?


That question can make people run right back to what almost killed them.


But you didn’t.


You stayed.


Even when boredom felt unbearable.

Even when calm felt suspicious.

Even when peace felt like the quiet before a storm.


That’s strength no one sees.


At six months, you’ve probably had moments where you thought, “Maybe I’m exaggerating how bad it was.” That’s your brain trying to normalize pain now that you’re not drowning in it.


Don’t fall for that lie.


You didn’t imagine the darkness.

You didn’t overreact.

You didn’t choose healing for no reason.


You chose it because you had to.


And now you’re living in the in-between — not who you were, not who you’re becoming yet.


That space is uncomfortable as hell.


But it’s also where rewiring happens.


Six months is where patterns start revealing themselves clearly. You see how certain people dysregulate you. How certain environments spike your anxiety. How certain thoughts trigger shame spirals.


And instead of blaming yourself, you’re starting — slowly — to respond differently.


You leave sooner.

You speak up a little faster.

You don’t chase validation as hard.

You notice red flags before you’re emotionally invested.


That’s not paranoia.


That’s wisdom earned the hard way.


If you’re a parent reading this, six months can be especially heavy. You might feel pressure to be “back to normal.” You might be grieving time, moments, versions of yourself you wish your kids had seen instead.


Let me say this gently but firmly:


Healing at six months is still active parenting — even when it’s invisible.


Your kids don’t need a perfect version of you.

They need a regulated one.

A present one.

A growing one.


And you’re becoming that — even on days it doesn’t feel like enough.


Six months is also where guilt gets louder.


Guilt about the past.

Guilt about mistakes.

Guilt about damage you can’t undo.

Guilt about not healing “faster.”


But guilt doesn’t mean you’re bad.


It means you care.


And caring is not something to punish yourself for.


At six months, you’re probably still having bad days. Days where old urges hit hard. Days where you think about using, self-harming, running, sabotaging relationships, blowing your life up just to feel familiar pain instead of unfamiliar calm.


Having those thoughts doesn’t mean you’re failing.


Not acting on them means you’re healing.


That distinction matters.


Six months is where you start trusting yourself a little — and then immediately second-guessing it. You test your own boundaries. You wonder if you’re allowed to feel okay. You wait for the drop.


But here’s the thing you’re learning now:


You can survive disappointment without destroying yourself.

You can survive conflict without imploding.

You can survive emotions without numbing.


That’s massive.


And it’s okay if you’re not proud yet. Pride often comes later — in hindsight.


Right now, consistency is the victory.


Showing up to therapy even when you’re tired.

Taking meds even when you resent needing them.

Eating something even when your body resists.

Reaching out instead of isolating completely.

Choosing sleep over chaos sometimes.


That shit adds up.


Six months ago, you were in survival mode.


Now you’re in rebuilding mode.


Rebuilding trust with yourself.

Rebuilding safety in your body.

Rebuilding a life that doesn’t revolve around crisis.


And rebuilding is slow. And frustrating. And quiet.


But it’s real.


If someone reading this is exactly six months in and wondering if it’s worth it — let this be the answer you borrow:


Yes.

Even when it’s boring.

Even when it’s lonely.

Even when you miss the intensity.


Especially then.


Because intensity almost killed you.

And steadiness is saving you.


You don’t need to rush the next phase.

You don’t need to have everything figured out.

You don’t need to trust the future yet.


You just need to keep choosing not to quit.


Six months is proof that you can.


And one day — sooner than you think — you’ll realize you’re no longer just surviving the days.


You’re building a life you don’t need to escape from.


— The Healing Chaos


“I stayed long enough for the chaos to quiet — and I didn’t run when it did.”


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

When the Weight Starts To Feel Too Heavy

Hey.... I've been sitting here staring at this blank screen for longer than I want to admit. It's funny - well, not funny - but strange, how I can feel so full of thoughts and yet have no idea how to begin putting any of them into words. My mind feels like a room filled with laundry piles I keep meaning to fold, but every time I turn around, more clothes are thrown aside. Eventually you stop trying to organize them, and you just sit in the middle of the mess, hoping no one opens the door.  That's kind of where I'm at right now.  Sitting in the middle of the mess.  Tired. Overwhelmed. A little bit numb. and very, very human.  The truth is... Life has been really rough lately. I mean the kind of rough that makes you wake up already exhausted, like you ran a marathon in your sleep.  The kind where your chest feels tight for no clear reason, and every day you're just trying to convince yourself you're fine enough to function. I've been moving on autopilot - resp...

You Are Not Too Much — You’re Carrying A Lot

If you’re reading this, I want you to pause for just a moment. Unclench your jaw. Drop your shoulders. Take one slow breath in—and let it out gently. You don’t need to be strong here. I know how easy it is to believe you’re “too much.” Too emotional. Too sensitive. Too intense. Too broken. Too complicated. Especially if you’ve spent your life being misunderstood, dismissed, or told that your pain makes other people uncomfortable. But I need you to hear this clearly: You are not too much. You are someone who has been through a lot. There is a difference. When you’ve lived through trauma, your nervous system learns to protect you in ways that don’t always look pretty. When you live with mental illness, your brain processes the world differently—not wrong, just differently. When you’ve had to survive instead of being cared for, your reactions make sense, even if others don’t understand them yet. Nothing about that makes you unlovable. Healing is not a straight line. S...

Borderline Is Loving Like a Wound and Being Punished For Bleeding

Living with Borderline Personality Disorder feels like being born without skin. Everything touches you too hard. Everything hurts deeper than it should. Everything matters more than you want it to. And then people look at you and ask why you’re “so dramatic,” why you “overreact,” why you “can’t just calm down.” As if you wouldn’t give anything to feel less. BPD isn’t a personality flaw. It’s not being manipulative. It’s not being toxic for fun. It’s not attention-seeking. It’s a nervous system that learned, very early on, that love is unstable and abandonment is inevitable. It’s what happens when attachment and trauma collide and set up permanent residence in your chest. It’s loving like your life depends on it—because somewhere deep inside, it always has. People love to describe BPD from the outside. Mood swings. Fear of abandonment. Intense relationships. Impulsivity. Emotional dysregulation. Cool. Clinical. Neat. That tells you absolutely nothing about what it’s li...